"You cannot hide the smoke of the hut you set on fire." (Burundi Proverb).

For the next series of blogs, I plan to center my thoughts on some African Proverbs I have been introduced to. While I was in Namibia this last year some of the locals used figures of speech and idioms that often made me smile. Upon returning to the states, one of our board members used a series of African Proverbs to lead our devotional at the August board meeting. Now it is my turn to share a few with you.

You cannot hide the smoke of the hut you set on fire, or in Biblical terms - "be sure your sins will find you out." I was recently reminded of just how transparent our lives really are when we stop long enough to take inventory. I was recently doing a little "sluething" on the internet and was shocked by some of the things that people allow to be posted online. Some people don't care, others simply don't stop to consider the consequences of their conduct.

Regardless of how carefully we try to cover our tracks - eventually someone will see the smoke from our burning hut. I can only imagine how King David felt when the prophet told him the story of ewe lamb. Outraged and indignant it must have been quite humbling when Nathan said, "You are that man."

Do Right Regardless

A friend and reader asked about how we handle difficult relationships - particularly those that involve conflict and people who don't meet their obligations. She shared her insights that it is our responsibility to do right regardless of the circumstances. Here are a few reasons to do the honorable thing, even if others don't.

1. My children are watching me. The lessons they learn about right and wrong, good and evil, but most importantly the lessons they learn on handling difficult situations come from watching me. They learn far more from my character than they learn from my monologues. If I want my children to live good honorable lives, then I need to model that for them.

2. You're better than that. My mother always told me not to lower myself to other people's standards. When I did stumble and mess us she reminded me - "you're better than that." Why would we criticize the failings of others only to model their very same behavior? Remember the Golden Rule, "Do unto others as you would have others do unto you."  Didn't Jesus also tell you to "Love your enemies, and to pray for those who persecute you" (Matt. 5:44).  Hard teachings - but we will be better people if we practice these truths.

3. Sow an act - reap a habit. Sow a habit - reap a character. Sow a character - reap a destiny. My children would get tired of me telling them, "By your actions you are determining what kind of person you will be when you grow up." How many times have you heard people say, usually after getting in trouble - "I'm really not that kind of person."  That may be true, but if you continue down that path - you will be.

The simple answer is to live a pro-active life. Make decisions based on your values, the things you know that are "true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable and praiseworthy" (Philippians 4:8).  If you make those kind of decisions, no one will ever question your character.

Digital Fingerprints

I was reading a friends updates on facebook and getting a good laugh from the stuff they found on a used cell phone they purchased. It was a great reminder that just because we hit delete or erase, it doesn't mean that our information isn't being stored somewhere. My son just accepted his first full time position after college and his employers told him, "Be careful what you post on your Facebook account." Good Advice!

I am 51 years old and seen a lot of good days and bad. I have concerned myself at times about saying the right thing, and gone off the reservation on other occasions. I have reached a point in my life where I am content to say what needs to be said and let the chips fall where they may.

I don't care if my comments are politically incorrect. I am not particularly concerned whether or not my religious friends agree with all my views, or if I rattle a few cages. As long as I can look in the mirror in good conscience.

I spent too much of my life worrying about what people think, how it will affect my job or influence. As Shakespeare so eloquently said, "to thine own self be true." That is why my blog is titled, UNTETHERED. I am putting my digital fingerprint out in cyberspace, knowing it never truly goes away. I believe that is the hieght of honesty. Say what you mean and stand behind it.

So as my video blog is preparing to soon follow, be warned. You won't always like what I say, but you can rest assured it comes from a place of honest conviction. And while our views change, and positions shift over time, what you read will reflect my thoughts or position at a particular place in my personal history.

Integrity

"The godly walk with integrity; blessed are their children who follow them." (Prov.  20:7).

We exert a lot of physical and emotional energy trying to please other people. Whether it is keeping up with the Jones'; trying to impress our boss; or just generally concerning ourselves with what somebody else might think - I wonder how much time and energy is spent in living up to others expectations.

We need to live our lives with character, integrity, honesty and values; but those values should be based on who we are deep down inside, not the values that someone else tries to impose upon us. Years ago a friend and business colleague shared this poem with me. I think it conveys this idea of being true to yourself.

The Man in the Glass

When you get what you want in your struggle for self
And the world makes you king for a day,
Just go to the mirror and look at yourself
And see what that man has to say.

For it isn’t your father or mother or wife
Whose judgment upon you must pass.
The fellow whose verdict counts most in you life
Is the one staring back from the glass.

You may be like Jack Horner and chisel a plum
And think you’re a wonderful guy.
But the man in the glass says you’re only a bum
If you can’t look him straight in the eye.

He’s the fellow to please-never mind all the rest,
For he’s with you clear to the end.
And you’ve passed your most dangerous, difficult test
If the man in the glass is your friend.

You may fool the whole world down the pathway of years
And get pats on the back as you pass.
But your final reward will be heartache and tears
If you’ve cheated the man in the glass.