This quote is part of a prayer written by Reinhold Niebuhr, often referred to as The Serenity Prayer. Over the past couple of weeks I found myself dissecting the comments of Mr. Niebuhr with some apprehension. I always thought this was a profound and profitable statment, but lets look at the three main parts of this proposition.
- Accept the things I cannot change. Finding a place of peace and acceptance among the many things that run amok in our life is more than challenging. Accepting that I won't get a raise this year, or coming to terms with a failed venture is one thing. Living with abuse, harrassment, or any oppressive circumstance requires a completely different level of inner control. I have found as hard as I may try, there are some things I may never come to peace with in my life.
- Change the things I can. How easy that sounds in the soothing prose that Niebuhr wrote, but indeed, he is correct to say it takes courage. Do I accept that I didn't get that raise, or work harder in 2010? Was it my fault, or do I need to confront my boss and remind him of my accomplishments? Sometimes acceptance is really nothing more than a cloak of cowardice. We tell ourselves there is nothing we can do about a situation, so we accept and surrender rather than fight.
- The wisdom to know the difference. How many sleepless nights have I spent trying to decide how to handle a difficult situation? Is it better just to let sleeping dogs lie, or to confront my fears and step forward into battle? Wisdom, we should seek her like precious jewels or gold tried in the fire. Of the three propositions in Niebuhr's prayer wisdom is the most important. Knowing where to take a stand, when to challenge conventional thinking, how to change the small sections of eternity that are within our grasp is where the real battle is fought.
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