Easy Button

Wouldn't it be great if life came with an EASY button. Yes, I sometimes shop at Staples, but that doesn't seem to help when you get to the really sticky situations in life. Unfortunatley, the easy path is usually the one that leads us away from our hopes and dreams. Rather than traveling through uncharted territories, or exploring new opportunities, taking the easy path usually takes down the same course that millions of others have travelled.

Most of us have probably heard the quote, "Pioneers take all the arrows." There certainly is danger in being the first to journey into brave new worlds, but I heard a great spin on that old addage that inspired me.  "Pioneers take all the arrows, but they also have the biggest ranches." I have taken a lot of arrows in my life, but I have also been rewarded with blessings few get to experience.  Watching the sun rise over the Mt. Cook in the Southern Alps, hearing the morning drums, followed by the soft echo of Christian hymns in the jungles of Africa, or building homes for those who lost everything after Hurricanes devastated Honduras. These are riches that far surpass any material gain I have ever enjoyed.

There have been many times in my life when I prayed that God would make my path EASY. Fortunately for me He had other plans. The trials, the tragedies and the heartaches of life have all been training grounds to minister to others. There have been times when I sought riches, wealth, fame and prestige, but God reminded me that life is most rewarding when I serve, when I humble myself, when I fulfill his plan for my life. So go ahead, hit the easy button, but if you do - you are missing out on the blessings that come through struggle and hardship.

Adversity

Adversity, hardship, and struggle are the training grounds for how we compete in life. I remember as a child wanting to quit the baseball team because I wasn't as good as some of the other players. Every time I dropped a fly ball, or booted a grounder I felt inadequate. I didn't handle adversity very well.

It wasn't till I had lived a while that I learned that adversity is the mental and moral equivilant of weight training, It gives you strength to deal with everything life can throw at you. This was the idea the philosopher Nietzsche was trying to get across when he said, "What doesn't kill us makes us stronger."

How we handle adversity says a lot about who we are and the level of success we will achieve in life. I have had my moments I wanted to give up, throw in the towel and bask in my own self-pity. I have felt beaten-down and defeated by life when a single ray of sunshine reminded me that their is so much to live for and fight for.

Which person are you? Are you the person who feels defeated when adversity comes, or do you welcome the challenge, engage the enemy and fight the good fight? You attitude and approach will determine your altitude in life.

It's the shoes!

What we say and what other people hear are often two vastly different things. In counseling, therapists use a technique called "active listening." This is where you listen to what the other person is saying and then repeat it back to them in your own words. Then that individual lets you know if you actual heard what they were saying.

We all have selective hearing. Sometimes we hear what we want to hear. Sometimes we simply aren't paying attention like we should. OH! Then there is the occasion that we honestly misunderstood what was stated. Let me give you an example of how our auditory equipment works:

"Sally, you look great today. I love the your new hair style and your dress looks fabulous. You are going to knock em dead at the party tonight. I am a little unsure about the shoes though."

Out of that glowing praise and recognition - what did Sally hear? My shoes don't match, they don't work with this dress, or worse - SHE HATES MY SHOES!!! In most cases that was not the intent of the individual, but that is what was heard. This goes on all the time in relationships and it often causes conflict. That is why you will hear people say, "All I do for you and you don't appreciate me," or something similar.

We forget all the goodness, kindness and generosity that is provided by others and end up focusing on the shoes. We get caught up in the moment, in the cross words or the inattention and forget all the good things we should be thankful for. When I went to motorcycle school they taught us how a tiny little blind spot the size of a pencil head could blot out our vision of an oncoming truck (blind spots are deadly). The closer we hold that small, insignificant item to us, the more it impairs our vision. The same is true in relationships. The closer we hold our prejudices and problems, the more it blots out all that is good.

I don't know what the answer is! I am as guilty as the next person of getting upset about some little thing and letting it blot out what really matters. I think the best thing for me is to donate all my shoes to Haiti, then I won't have any distractions.  :-)

Trent Wheeler