I just don't get it . . .

Why do bad things happen to good people? Why is it that life just stinks sometimes? Why do my plans all seem for naught, or my life doesn't seem to work out the way I planned? I understand we are supposed to have faith. I realize that God promises that "all things work together for good..." (Romans 8:28). I know that God said, "my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways..." (Isaiah 55:8), but understanding that in my head doesn't always translate to understanding that in my heart.

I am sharing my doubts and fears today because I know that I am not alone in those feelings. There are so many people who go through periods of doubt, but are afraid to voice them. If they speak up, a well meaning brother or sister might give them a spiritual placebo. You just need to have a stronger faith! You need to pray more, or study more, or . . .

I am not discounting the importance of spiritual disciplines in our lives, but as Christians we need to feel safe in telling others about our doubts and fears. I fear at times that my example may have sent the wrong message to my children. I fear that my faith is weak and I haven't always grown in my Christian virtues. I openly wonder at times why God allows me to experience some the things I experience.

But doesn't being a Christian mean that we should trust in God, understand that he has a plan, know that HE is faithful.  Yes, but I still don't understand it all at times. Job, had a similar problem. God said, "There is no one on earth like him; he is blameless and upright, a man who fears God and shuns evil." (Job 1:8). Here is a man of pretty strong faith, but he questioned God; he struggled with the circumstances of his life - WHY would God let this happen to me?

At times I feel like a puppet in the hands of an angry God. Some of you may say, "Trent, how can you say that?"  It isn't about God being unfair, or unjust - it represents my challenge with the flesh. Whatever your interpretation of the events at the cross, I can still hear the voice of my Savior as he too cries out, "My God, My God, why has thou forskaen me" (Matthew 27:46).

So let us be understanding when our brethren struggle with their faith. Let us encourage them as they seek answers to the paintful questions of life. Let us remind them that they are not alone in their doubts and fears. Some of the greatest men and women of faith have also struggled.  At times I don't understand, but I strive to persevere.  May God bless your journey to its victorious conclusion.

I Walk Alone

I Walk Alone. There are days in most our lives where we walk alone. It is usually by choice though we hate to admit that. It is easier when troubles come to say that "God, our family, or the world has abandoned us," than to humble ourselves and ask for help, comfort or strength.

I Walk Alone. Is it a the fierce independence and stubbornness, or fear that cause us to withdraw and fight our battles alone? I will fight, I will conquer, I will overcome are powerful motivations and messages, but are they driven by strength or pride?

I Walk Alone. I find myself battling the demons of this life, the failures of my past, but most significantly there is the war that goes on within me. I lock all those challenges away in a little box that I will not share with those who can help me the most.

I Walk Alone. Its not the daily challenges that beat me down. There are no mountains that are too big to climb, or seas to vast to sail. Until this day every failure, dissappointment, challenge and loss is seen through the rear view mirror of life. The weight, burden and greatest obstacle that I face today is that I walk alone.